Every pupil has the right to enjoy his/her time in Ratoath Senior National School, free from bullying in the school and school yard, on the way to school and on the way home.
Bullying is a problem, which many children have to deal with and one which is of great concern to parents and teachers. It is a problem, which requires co-operation between schools and parents in seeking solutions.
Bullying is repeated aggression, verbal, psychological or physical, conducted by an individual or group. It may manifest itself in such forms as
- intimidation or harassment
- aggression
- verbal abuse
- humiliation
- undermining
- exclusion or isolation
- damage to property
- extortion
- name calling and slagging.
- physical assault
- bullying or intimidation by phone, text or internet
- written form
It is vital that independence and confidence are fostered in children. Talking to and listening to children are also important factors in helping the child to deal with early approaches from a bully.
Children need to have the confidence to say 'No' in a good assertive tone of voice if they are approached for lunch or possessions. Children who are confident of their abilities and of their appearance are also more likely to shrug off a taunt or a jibe. They also need to know that they have the right to tell an adult about a problem. Bullies will select children whom they feel can be kept quiet.
Building self esteem and a quiet sense of confidence is equally important for the child who is a bully, as it is for the potential victims.
Why do some Children become Bullies?
This can happen for many reasons and may include the following:
- They may be bullied themselves.
- They may feel inadequate and lack confidence in themselves.
- They may find it difficult to socialise with their peers and so pick on younger, more vulnerable children.
- They may be very spoilt and go totally unchallenged at home.
- Some children become involved in bullying by acting as bystanders or supporters of a bully. If this is the case it must be pointed out that they are equally guilty of bullying.
Where it can happen
Bullying of children by other children can happen in the playground, in the classroom, in the corridors, in the toilets, on the sports field, on the way to and from school and on the bus to and from school.
All children have the right to come to school and go home from school without being threatened, intimidated, harassed, verbally abused, physically assaulted etc.
If Your Child is a Bully
It is important to acknowledge that fact and help him/her to overcome this. One of the most difficult problems which schools face in tackling bullying is getting the child and parents to acknowledge the fact that they are involved in such behaviour.
What To Do
- Try to find out if this is a temporary response to something else in the child's life, e.g. a new baby, a bereavement, stress at home.
- Talk to your child - try to get your child to understand how the victim feels - help your child to socialise by inviting other children to play on outings etc. Don't respond by being a bully yourself. Hitting and verbal attack will make the situation worse. You will need to deal with this problem over a period of time.
- Talk to the child's teacher - you will find teachers willing to help. It is important that you and the teacher take the same approach to the problem
- Bullies often suffer from a lack of confidence. Don't compare your child's achievement with others. Praise helpful, kind behaviour at every opportunity.
- Children should be taught to accept differences in others. If your child always seems overly critical of others, help by making positive remarks about other children
- You may need help if your child has a serious behavioural problem - the school or your GP can refer him/her to the Child Guidance Clinic if necessary.
If Your Child Tells You s/he is Being Bullied
- Stay calm - don't overreact no matter what you are feeling. Your reaction may convey a sense of anger or disappointment to the child and could be counter-productive. Children who are bullied often feel a sense of failure and guilt. Your response should explain that they are not at fault and that this is a problem, which can be overcome.
- Teaching the child that she/he has the right to say 'No' and to carry him/herself in a confident way will deal with many situations. Establish the right to tell and talk about the problem.
- Talk to the teacher. Bullying is a hidden activity and with classes of up to 35 it can be difficult for teachers to detect. Teachers need the support of parents in tackling this problem.
- If the bullying is physical — don't tell your child to hit back. Schools cannot encourage children to engage in violent behaviour and conflicting advice will only confuse the child. Also, telling a vulnerable child to hit back is asking the impossible of them and will only add to their sense of failure when they find they cannot do so.
- Children can be vulnerable and need help to socialise. You can facilitate this by inviting children to play and by enlisting the help of other parents.
- It is important to tell children that some situations are impossible and that safety must come first. Advise your child that sometimes, if threatened, it would be better to give money or possessions, get away and tell. It would be important in a situation like this that the child be praised for using common-sense.
- Some children attract bullies because of poor personal hygiene or habits. If this is the case it can be easily overcome with help from you.
Possible Signs that a Child is a Victim of Bullying
- May begin to do poorly at school.
- May have unexplained bruises or scratches and may be evasive when questioned about them.
- May begin to bully other children in the family.
- May be unwilling to go to school or to walk to and from school.
- May come home regularly with books or clothes torn or missing.
The school's response is continued development of a positive school climate focusing on respect for the individual. An important element of school policy is to raise awareness that bullying is unacceptable behaviour. Our school will not tolerate any unkind actions or remarks even if these were not meant to hurt. Pupils should be encouraged to support each other by reporting all incidents. It is made clear to pupils in these circumstances that they are behaving responsibly and not telling tales.
General Principles to Counter Bullying
- the school acknowledges the right of each member of the school community to enjoy school in a secure environment
- the school promotes positive habits of self-respect, self-discipline and responsibility amongst all of its members
- the school disapproves of vulgar, offensive, sectarian or other aggressive behaviour by any of its members
- the school has a clear commitment to promoting equity in general and gender equity in particular in all aspects of its functioning
- the school has the capacity to change in response to pupils' needs
- the school identifies aspects of the curriculum through which positive and lasting influences can be exerted towards forming pupils' attitudes and values
- the school takes particular care of 'at risk' pupils and uses its monitoring system to provide early intervention when/if necessary and responds to the needs, fears or anxieties of individual members in a sensitive manner
- the school recognises the need to co-operate with and keep parents informed on procedures to improve relationships within the school community
- the school recognises the right of parents to share in the task of equipping the pupil with a range of life-skills
- the school recognises the role of other community agencies in preventing and dealing with bullying
- the school promotes habits of mutual respect, courtesy and an awareness of the interdependence of people in a group and a community
- the school acknowledges the uniqueness of each individual and his or her worth as a human being
- the school promotes qualities of social responsibility, tolerance and understanding among all its members both in school and out of school
- staff members share a collegiate responsibility, under the direction of the Principal teacher, to act in preventing bullying/aggressive behaviour by any member of the school.
Procedures for Dealing with Bullying
- All incidents will be investigated and dealt with by teachers.
- Serious cases are to be referred immediately to the Principal.
- Those involved will be interviewed individually and collectively.
- Communications with parents will be necessary if such behaviour continues.
- Teachers will keep a written record of serious incidents of misbehaviour.
- Parents have a responsibility to respond to allegations and/or incidents of bullying by their children.